what would you do if you get chased out from your home? no where to go. homeless and suddenly missing the one who was always hold dear to you. missing the warm you longing to and reach your break down point where you see living life no longer have any meaning. and in that moment of despair one person come to your mind. the one you longed deep inside you. and only because of that person you continue on with a little light in your heart. even if that person doesnt feel the same, you still on hoping for it. slowly you will feel so tired. so tired till it rejects all logic. life or death have no difference to you. you worse nightmare keep on coming back. as if life itself never allow you to forget about the one you love most. it keep on coming and keep on coming till you unable to sense anything around you. and what you miss most is the imposible. and still you continue your life as normal. keep on smiling. but crying inside. crying like there is no tomorrow. tears that you thought have stopped, still flowing through in your heart, your vein, your whole body. a never end winter. and there is nothing you wish more than death to end all sorrow. but still you live on cuz that one person smile. a smile in your memory. a beautiful memory where you keep on living in. why do you keep on fooling yourself?

cuz love is to make us look like fool. as love it defy any logics and senses which make you go haywire. i still love that person.

nothing to do for the whole day. initially was planning to sentosa but it been raining for the whole entire day till late afternoon. so sentosa trip was canceled. and today suppose to be full sun eclipse. but cant find a place to watch it. so end up wasting time at friends house and play lan games. haven been playing for long time. some how today play not like last time. not much feeling in it. guess getting bored for all this game etc. looking for some activities that more meaning in it. hmmm is it what it call growing up. haven have this kind of feeling for long time. and today my attachment company called me. where my working hours will be from 8am to 5.30pm, long hours but what to expect from full time working life style. and the sad part is no more studying or more like the best part lol...

my future car


cool bike(gonna buy it with my first salary)

yeah found job for next week. work in IT fair at suntec. nice!!! one week pass attachment soon. and still haven recieve any call from the company. think there will be no more call so there is no need to wait anymore. this coming wed is my ipp briefing shall see where i am going to attach to.

been going to bank this few days and meet this finance consultant. her facial and action, her build basicly her everything even her facial expression very similar to someone that once close to me. the only diff is their age. sigh!!! feel emo when meet her again at the bank. not only me say so but my 2 buds also say she looks like her. shit i hate this feeling. thought i have overcome this period but i am wrong. how little i noe about myself although i live with myself like forever. sigh!!! sometime you will never noe something for certain although you have live with them for ages or forever. human can never understand everything though they have learn everything. sigh!!! time will revealed man depest inner thought. or what my friend always say "time is the greatest revealer!"

vitagen with collagen?? say will increase your body vitality and help improve your muscle and joint etc... sound too promising but it only for ppl age 25 and above... but can drink it although you are not tt age yet since prevent early can help your future. think i going to try it since having joint pains lately due to overly exercise. i am getting older sad!!!